Group Facilitator & Administrator
“I think being older, 42 when I had Molly, had a big impact on my journey to becoming a mum, having had miscarriages, then a difficult pregnancy with health concerns it was a huge relief when Molly arrived safely, having waited years for this to happen my expectations were high.
Feeding issues became overwhelming, having to combination feed and express every few hours became physically and emotionally draining. Massive feelings of guilt ensued when I eventually switched to exclusively bottle feeding.
Feeding with a bottle became a battle, Molly was losing weight and dropping on the charts, reflux reared its ugly head and then a milk allergy, after several trips to health care professionals it was picked up that Molly had a heart murmur, what followed was a bit of a blur but after a straightforward operation Molly was home and things started to improve.
For me this is when I started to feel at my worst, having run on adrenaline for several weeks my mind and body were exhausted, I felt a sense of dread waking each day and my anxiety levels were through the roof, my health visitor suggested I may have PND but I was reluctant to accept this, subsequent visits from her followed and each time she gently prodded me to go to the GP and attend SMILE.
When I finally went to see the GP it was a relief to finally admit to myself that I did have PND and after a period taking medication and amazing support from the SMILE team I began to feel better and was able to enjoy being a mum again.”